BRATTLEBORO, VT—Rubbing his hands together in what appeared to be more anticipation than he could contain, local man Dennis Kaili stated Tuesday that the dollar bill currently dangling from a fishing line right there along the path he was walking sure did look enticing. “By gosh, that’s one good-lookin’ buckaroo, ain’t it?” said Kaili, a wide grin reportedly spreading across his face as he took in the sight of the dollar, a hook, and the fishing line, which disappeared into a row of bushes. “And it’s ripe for the pickin’, too! If I jump on it real fast, I’m sure I could grab it. Don’t look like there’s anyone ’round gonna beat me to it. Yup, that dollar’s as good as mine!” At press time, sources confirmed Kaili was being pulled along the sidewalk with the hook in his cheek and still struggling to get the dollar bill off the line and into his pocket.

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